I've been trying to write this post for days. Literally day's have gone by with, at best, a few mediocre drafts jotted on questionable scraps of paper. All that effort, (smirk) with the plan of cobbling the patchwork together in a rhapsodic and sweeping soliloquy... but no. I can't locate the questionable scraps and none of the ones I've located make any sort of sense. Typical.
So I start anew with fresh woman rage to spur me on. Woman rage is everywhere these days isn't it? Suddenly in my most potent 30's I'm seeing and experiencing the "enough" phenomenon. In my conservative work place far away from the super celebrities in California, I am having the most stimulating lunches and tea breaks with women who are Fed. Up. The sharing of experiences of harassment, discomfort, condescension and straight up CREEPY behavior are familiar and frustrating.
Many of you watched (or heard the aftermath of) the Golden Globes. It was the latest in a heavy schedule of very public, unified, assertions of some of the most powerful women in Hollywood against the "Woman Tax" we women are all tired of paying.
*Woman tax - The discounting of human dignity through the experience of: humiliation, degradation, condescension, sexual intimidation, physical and/or emotional abuse, harassment and/or other soul crushing, life altering episode(s) incurred and experienced at some time and in some form by a woman by virtue of being BORN a woman. Note - both genders assume role of tax collector in the most disgustingly base ways.
I was taken aback by the choice of the unified dress code of black (I thought white would have been a more appropriate choice... but then again that too has interpretive connotations). Let's talk hair of the evening. There were very few if any sexy, tossed up, tumble down, come hither styles usually seen paired with the colorful, slits up to here and necklines down to there couture gowns. The hair was simple and serious. Faces were exposed. It wasn't about enhancement or adornment, it wasn't ugly or severe - it was business. We saw faces. Really saw faces. The minimalism was telling.
Sometimes hair can and should be part of the fantasy creation of untouchable goddess like womanhood, we all seek to create those moments of slay and watch the persons, objects or goals of our desire, quest or conquering pray for strength to resist our majestic might. I freely admit to and embrace the use of a full arsenal of whatever you've got to assert your position.
The unified Globes hair statement made me think of how and what we communicate with our hair. There are heaps of information about "take me seriously hair". Oddly enough, its all about showing your face and letting the world see who you really are. In other words, "façade" hair is not going to communicate you mean business unless the situation itself calls for that aesthetic.
As Oprah said during her news making speech at the Globes,
"...[s]peaking your truth is the most powerful tool we all have."
The time for us, who need not get red carpet ready (any day of the week); who work, go to school, participate in our communities in every and any capacity - everyday; who grind passionless but striving for purpose; who are thanked-less, overlooked, dismissed objectified, made to feel less than and INSECURE as hell as a result, while all the while paying that godforsaken Woman Tax over and over and over again by just waking in the morning (and perhaps multiple times through the day), to clear our hair from our lovely faces. Dare to be seen, and more importantly LIVE .OUR. TRUTH.
Within our hands (MEN and WOMEN), in the expanse of your mind and in the depth of your heart lies your own justice.
*This definition is mine and crafted by me in this way, in JUST this way, because I have witnessed, heard or personally experienced (shudder) some of the above.*